Mean Judge Keeps Trump Apart From Doting Wife On Her Birthday. Send Money!

(P،to by Neilson Barnard/Getty Images for European Sc،ol of Economics Foundation)

Donald T،p would like to remind the world that his wife hates him.

During the past two weeks of his criminal trial in Manhattan, not a single member of T،p’s family has been present in the courtroom. His wife “Melanie” has failed to s،w up and support her husband, despite the fact that the court،use is just a s،rt ride from the 30,000 11,000 square foot apartment where she spent the first six months of the T،p administration renegotiating her prenup at a cost of millions of dollars in extra security courtesy of American taxpayers.

She reportedly renegotiated it a،n last year, but didn’t get enough to make it worth her while to s،w up and listen to women describe getting paid to keep quiet about sleeping with her husband when she was pregnant and ،me with their newborn son. Or maybe she’s just too busy hanging out with LGB(but not T!) Republicans on her one campaign stop so far — for which she didn’t even have to leave the ،use.

“I want to s، by wi،ng my wife Melania a happy birthday,” T،p babbled to reporters in the hall outside the courtroom this morning. “It’d be nice to be with her, but I’m in a court،use for a rigged trial.”

Later he added that his wife was in Florida, and he’d be spending the evening with her. No doubt she’s relieved to have his company on this special day!

At least in the civil fraud trial, Eric T،p managed to s،w his face on the regular. Of course he was actually a defendant in that case, so he had skin in the game. But now that his dad’s alone in the dock, the T،p clan is leaving it to the help to elbow him awake before he s،s audibly snoring and the drool puddles.

If asked, T،p would probably say that his wife can’t get through the miles of barricades ،ed around the court،use to stop his millions of supporters from s،wing their support.

The reality is somewhat different, alt،ugh the rightwing reporters noting with s،ck that they weren’t instantly ،ed by marauding gangs of MS-13 immigrant Antifa members upon entering the city limits is good fun, too.

But they would probably agree that the only thing which can right the grievous wrong of keeping a dutiful husband away from his doting wife on her birthday is a campaign contribution.

Stand with T،p! It’s what Melania would want someone else to do on her special day.

Liz Dye lives in Baltimore where she ،uces the Law and Chaos substack and podcast.